Late night

As I’m sitting in bed with the lights off, tv on, and laptop by my side, Carter is pitching a fit across the hall.  It is now 12:30 am and he is still awake.  Everytime there is silence at the other end of the hall, I hold my breath, hoping that he has finally decided to give up and go to sleep.  Well, considering I just heard another whine, I’m going to breathe a sigh of frustration.  Why won’t this kid go to sleep???!!! He just keeps crying and saying “EEEEEEEEEEEE” (yes, that’s the letter E repeated).  I’m not sure why, but that’s his expression.  Happiness, sadness, fear, doesn’t matter…. “eeeeeeeeeeee” is what he says. 

I’m currently working on my research paper topic for graduate school and I am totally lost and confused.  I have no idea what I am doing and since it is waaaaaaaaaaaaay past my bedtime I am starting to care less about this damn paper.  Tomorrow (or should I say today) will be a busy day and so will the rest of the week, considering I have to pack everyone and prepare for the trip to Dallas.  I have to pack up the kids, which means for Carter I have to pack the whole house.  I’m still so nervous about leaving him for a few days even though he will be at my mom’s house.  Taking him out of his element and being away from him for more than a day just leaves me with a worried feeling.  Besides packing myself and the kids, I have to make sure I get all of my school work completed and the bills paid before hand, because I DO NOT want to have to worry about this stuff while I’m on vacation.  Or when I come back, for that matter. 

Hopefully all goes well and I can relax and have some fun before it’s back to life, back to reality. 

I’m wondering if I should just call it quits for now and continue this mess tomorrow.  I just dread this research paper.  It’s only the beginning and I’m already stuck, showing signs of stress and frustration.  This paper is causing me major anxiety and I haven’t even started it yet! 

I’m so tired right now I don’t even feel like picking up the laptop or my books that are squeezed in between myself and Q, who is snoring next to me.  I wish I were sleeping that peacefully right now.  Hell, I wish Carter were sleeping that peacefully right now.  I just heard another short whine from him, so I’m hoping that since his cries are getting shorter, they will eventually disappear and in the next 5 minutes he will be knocked out.  (I won’t hold my breath on that one).

I guess it’s time for me to call it a night. 

Until next time,

–jamie

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