My Daily Dose of Autism

These last few days I’ve really taken the time to put things in perspective.  I’ve realized that I spend too much of my time and energy on things that do not matter. I stress too much, I worry too much, I over analyze too much, and I plan too much. I’m just too much. I’ve come to the realization that I need to stop and smell the roses. I’m beginning to see the purpose of all of these old quotes….

“You don’t know what you have until it’s gone”

“Don’t sweat the small stuff”

“Cherish the differences as well as the similarities”

“What’s the use of worrying? It never was worthwhile”

I’m finally starting to get it. The cloak of sadness I’ve been under has been yanked off of me and I’ve stepped out into clarity. It’s like a breath of fresh air.

I’m always in a rush, I’m always tired, I’m always on edge, I’m always busy. My kids want my attention, they want me to take time to watch what they want to watch and do what they want to do. They want me to be their mom. I haven’t given them much of myself. I’ve given them the run down version of me. Before I know it my kids will be adults and looking to their future.  That’s when I’ll be looking into the past….with regret. Wishing I would have stopped and taken the time to enjoy them. To look at them and take their innocence in. Wishing I would have just let myself be free from my own prison of sadness and bitterness. I want to be happy, to be relaxed, and to laugh.

I promise to take my time now. I promise to be different and to be available. I promise to be calm and happy. I promise to enjoy my kids and my life without the stress I bring on.

I promise to stop and smell the roses.

2 thoughts on “My Daily Dose of Autism

  1. southerngirlinarizona says:

    I recently have had this realization. It’s so easy to tell my kids, “we can do it later”…and I’m trying to break that habit. This morning, our last morning in a hotel for a mini vacation, we even had pillow fight! It was so fun, not being hit with the pillow, but hearing my daughter laugh so hard when she defeated mommy! They are only little once, and every moment is a moment to be cherished!

    Like

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